I have been spending far too much time pickling my brains in television/detective series. I believe I started another post with just this observation (Perry Mason, October 27 post, and way before any pandemics legitimized this shameful waste of little grey cells cells).

But I have moved far beyond Perry Mason and Columbo now. And even beyond Britbox and Amazon Prime. I have discovered MhZ. Television series from all over Europe. In European (a language I am trying to learn. For now, subtitles help).

I will not bore you (i.e., embarrass myself) by owning up to some of the stuff I have watched. But it’s pretty fascinating—I’ve seen a lot of places. OK, so I have to mention a French series, Murder in…, which is profoundly silly and definitely merits being embarrassed about. The plotting is more than usually ridiculous—murders based on obscure rituals and the like. (As if. You have to be able to suspend disbelief in order to enjoy the mystery/detective genre, but there are limits.) The episodes stand alone, with different detectives in each. What ties the whole together is the title which is really "Murder in… [your region here]." Many many regions. This show was clearly sponsored by the French Tourist Board, and the landscapes are worth watching. Even if people are rolled down the hill in barrels after death for no apparent reason or shot with crossbows in medieval parades as a message.

I’m learning about Rostock, Regensburg, Sandhamn, Venice, Sicily, Pont-Aven, Hannover.

Better yet, I have developed a raft of cultural stereotypes. True to my own stereotype, I find the German stuff easiest to watch. Including the Inspector Brunetti series, which takes place in Venice, but is produced by Germans and has a German script. (I have read these novels in German as well. They were written by an American expat, but picked up and beloved in Germany well before they became bestsellers here. But having read them, I must say the TV series suffers under the heavy German hand—humor is applied, and that is not a strong suit. Stereotype in this case applies.)

And I’m learning the sound, if not the absolute sense, of languages. This I find actually worthwhile. I find myself correcting subtitles as I listen. I sometimes understand Swedish. There is even a Swiss crime drama (and it is as uninteresting as it sounds) so I can learn Schwyzertüütsch. I’m not progressing well with the Scandinavian tongues; although there are plenty of shows, they’re too brutal for me to watch. I'm also giving up my chance for an Austrian accent and scenes of Vienna, because the series I found is too stupid. Also, I’m sorry to say, fewer opportunities for hearing Italian than I would have like (vide Vienna). Even I have my standards (but wait until you see the next post…)

There are a number of series in which presentable, well-dressed women are paired with hugely overweight, mostly unshaven (and yet strangely—I do mean strangely, though it’s written into the script, so it must be true—attractive) partners. This disturbs me. But there’s plenty of that going around in non-Euro shows. This disturbs me.

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