...to watch Sullivan's Travels* again, Nick reminded me when I said I felt narcissistic and disrespectful writing about silly stuff these days. He's right -- (not that I presume to compare myself to Preston Sturges). But I get his point. Or Andy Zaltzman's** point, "The heavier the shit going down, the further I need to get away from it." Just for a minute. Just a minute.
That said, I'm starting writing again (or maybe just having a flash in the pan again) from a point of narcissistic depression. The result of trying to take a healthy walk yesterday and today to get myself out of narcissistic depression.
So, walking on the two most beautiful days of the year has been terrible. As previously noted, because bike paths are now tainted, I am limited to the cemeteries*** or sidewalks. So my walks are straight lines punctuated with right angles. They lack shade and birds. I come back more depressed--probably in part because my blood oxygen level decreases with every pull of air through damp cloth.
Also, now, RI is in phase 2 of reopening, which according to the government means, "Let's see if this results in more cases, and we'll pull back if we start stretching capacity" but to the populace -- No. I don't want to wrong anyone. They're still taking this seriously and behaving responsibly. And they're better informed. And you can be, too. Just follow these phase 2 guidelines…
You can't catch coronavirus and don't need to wear a mask any more if:
You are in your yard (a week ago).
You are outside (now).
You have wheels: Cars, motorcycles, bicycles, roller blades, skateboards. And I say "have" advisedly. If you're walking your bike or leaning against a car, that counts. Carrying a wheel will also protect you.
You are surrounded by other people not wearing masks, especially surrounded by children not wearing masks--the more, the better your chances of being immune.
Your mask is dangling from your ear or wrapped around your neck.
And especially you can't catch coronavirus and don't need to wear a mask any more if the other person is wearing a mask. Or even if only one person in your visual field is wearing a mask. If you are the one not wearing a mask, this also gives you the right (part of phase 2 guidelines) to look at the mask-wearing person as though they were an idiot. That other person would be me. (Walking into town to deposit a check (i.e., virtuous walking), I was wearing a hat and sunglasses and very conscious that I looked like a crazy lady. So perhaps the weird looks were merited. But that would be diluting the story.) Also that person would be a friend of ours with her children who were harassed yesterday.
The part about not catching coronavirus if the other person is wearing a mask is somewhat true, in that a non-medical grade mask protects other people from some of your spit. It does not protect you from theirs, so I regard others' refusal to wear theirs as an act of war. Nick (who used to do a lot of airbrush work and knows about particle masks), feeling much the same--both damp and hostile--has just ordered us some lightweight neoprene masks that have replaceable carbon filters and little silicone vents that open up when you exhale. In other words, the air you breathe is filtered and dry and the air you exhale is unfiltered spit. Fuck you, RI.****
A different, but related, mask-y concern is the aesthetics of...mask tan. Bet you didn't think about that. One might justifiably risk one's (i.e., others') life to avoid this. I understand. And yet...with a little natural color in the right places, I've got cheekbones like cut glass and look about 20 years younger. I am definitely ready for my close-up.
* It's a screwball comedy about, eventually, a chain gang. I won't be giving a synopsis. Just watch it if you can. Sturges is a genius.
** The very funny man behind The Bugle podcast. Often offensively juvenile/lame. But but when it’s good, it’s very, very good. And I depend on it.
*** More on those again soon, if I get my writing shit together--they are not without their points of interest. Nothing is without its points of interest.
**** I can't really be that irresponsible, can I? You can cover this neoprene mask with a fine mesh of some sort that will allow you to breathe easily and will still keep you from spitting on people. I would like to think that I would do this. But I won’t. Fuck you anyway, RI.